


Stupid Crush

by johnils (eggtarts)



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: M/M, band!au, infatuated!taeyong, tw: usage of cigarette and alcohol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-15
Updated: 2017-04-15
Packaged: 2018-10-19 05:26:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10633155
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eggtarts/pseuds/johnils
Summary: Lee Taeyong has a stupid crush on a boy who has the stupidest cutest smile.





	

_longing (n) – a yearning desire; strong, persistent desire or craving, especially for something unattainable or distant._

  


**i.**

There were a few instances where Lee Taeyong had found himself longing for Jung Jaehyun. 

It’s stupid, Taeyong tried persuading himself. The white-haired male could never phantom the ideas of liking someone – much more longing for them like how Icarus had longed for warmth. Taeyong may have even found himself falling into the sea like how Icarus had his wax wings melted from wanting to go near the sun. In despair, Taeyong would have met the same fate but instead of falling into a sea, he might as well fall into a state of infatuation.

It’s really stupid how Lee Taeyong found himself harbouring this stupid little crush on Jung Jaehyun all because that stupid brunette has this incredibly cute but stupid little smile when he talks to Lee Taeyong and everything Jung Jaehyun does after that one time he had smiled at Taeyong grew into this stupid crush and Taeyong felt stupid for having the word ‘stupid’ being his only vocabulary because Jung Jaehyun takes the words out of him (which is rather untrue because every stupid love song Taeyong writes for his band, The And City, is _literally_ about Jung Jaehyun. No one ever assumes otherwise because Taeyong looked like the type to have his own experience of having flings here and there to be writing about romance and heartbreaks.)

Taeyong’s little crush and harbouring towards Jung Jaehyun does not explain how he is now with Jaehyun in the back alley. It’s usually him and Taeil, the band’s frontman. Occasionally when Taeil’s throat isn’t in the best condition to be taking a drag with him or for the cold weather, Hansol would be Taeyong’s companion instead. But here he was, with Jung Jaehyun. 

The white-haired male has a lighted bud to his lips. It’s dry and sat rather heavily this evening compared to the other many times Taeyong always needs his drag when he is nervous before a gig. This has been Taeyong’s usual routine before their gig ever since he and his band had started performing publicly. It doesn’t matter how many times they had performed before this, Taeyong would still get so nervous every other time and he can only calm himself after a drag or two. Sometimes alcohol helps but Taeyong isn’t a fan of bitter drinks before gigs when his life is as bitter as it gets though he would still resort to it on any other days when needed. This evening was no different. (Perhaps apart from Jaehyun being his company.)

“Hey, slow down on the drag.” Jaehyun chuckled softly, his voice sounding a little hoarse from not speaking out while the two of them are out in the alley for about a good twenty minutes now. 

Taeyong found his head going haywire upon hearing Jaehyun’s chuckle. It’s cute as heck and Taeyong _hates_ it. He took his nth drag to stop the sound of Jaehyun’s chuckle in the back of his head, letting his mind feel fuzzy instead. It keeps getting dryer with each suck Taeyong takes. Suddenly, he felt as though the world was spinning along his heart racing quickly as though he had run for miles. He must be nerve-wrecked. 

“Just nervous.” Taeyong mumbled his replies as he removes the dry bud from his lips, toying with it instead between his fingers and flickering it every bit and then so that the burnt parts would drop off to the grey pavement.

“You’re gonna die young if you keep smoking before shows and on every other day as well.” Jaehyun casually mentions, moving himself from leaning against the bricked wall opposite to where Taeyong is and going close to the male. Taeyong’s heart suddenly races when Jaehyun is close him, shoulder against shoulder. He blames it on the ‘kick’ of the cigarette.

“It’s an addiction. I’m not about to go on with a John Green metaphor statement and say smoking isn’t gonna kill me. It _will_ but well, you only live once.” the white-haired male shrugged, shoving one of his hands to his pocket as he takes another drag then toys with the lighted short stick between his fingers.

Jaehyun looked at Taeyong’s fingers rather eagerly and curiously. After a while, Jaehyun asked, “Can I try?”

Taeyong stared at Jaehyun as if the latter had grown two heads from what he had said. Jaehyun doesn’t take his words back.

“Well help yourself then.” the smoker passed his cigarette to the curious man who took the bud rather excitedly. He watched as the other male places the cigarette between his lips much like how Taeyong did – the left corner of his lips with the lighted end facing downwards. Taeyong then thought about how it would feel to have his lips against Jaehyun’s. He imagined them to be soft, much like the brunette’s milky-like skin.

The sound of Jaehyun coughing then brings Taeyong back to reality, which didn’t surprise the white-haired male. The other male is of course a first-time smoker. Taeyong was like that too when he was an amateur and when he had his first cigarette out of curiousity. Jaehyun doesn’t stop coughing until a good full minute.

“Shit. Dude, you alright?” Taeyong lightly pats Jaehyun’s back in a way to soothe the other male. Jaehyun laughed when he recovered. 

“Not the best experience but honestly I should have asked you how do I drag.” Jaehyun kept laughing and wiped the gathering tears from the corner of his eyes from his coughing fit earlier. “I wouldn’t want to try it any time soon and will stick to vaping.”

“Vaping is for losers.” Taeyong playfully rolled his eyes and took the remaining of his bud back from Jaehyun and placed it between his lips, finishing the rest of the drag.

“Says the one who tried vaping from Hansol.”

" _Touché_ ” 

  


  
  


**ii.**

Taeyong has a bottle of beer in hand. Not that it plays a huge significance but just before practice, Jaehyun drank from it and now Taeyong can’t stop thinking once again about how soft Jaehyun’s lips are and for the fact that he _terribly_ wants to kiss the other male. The white-haired male looked at the way Jaehyun’s Adam’s apple bobbed when the latter downed the alcohol and it left Taeyong’s own throat dry from the action. The other male even made it a point to swipe his tongue over his chapped lips and it affects Taeyong _so much_. He then proceeds to blame on the beer because he feels giddy in his infatuated thoughts. It doesn’t even help that when Jaehyun returns the bottle of beer back, Jaehyun’s smile seem different than his usual ones – sweeter and giving a more intoxicated effect than the bottle of beer Taeyong had drank. It made Taeyong feel sick. He blames it on the beer _again_ instead of his unknown harbouring infatuation for Jaehyun because it’s his third bottle for the day. 

The band, The And City, had just finish one of their few rounds of band practice for their gig next week. They’ve finish going through a new set list with the few songs Taeyong had composed recently and some of which were pitched in and improvised along the way during the practice by Hansol. Overall, the practice had brought a sense of adrenaline in which had brought up the mood of the entire group. Of course, it had been because they had all been passionate in the music they were making (if not, Taeyong’s excuse to let himself be lost in the music in exchange of not thinking about how soft Jaehyun’s lips are).

“Taeyong. You kinda nailed the practice today. What gives?” Moon Taeil, the frontman and guitarist of The And City asks with a smile.

Taeyong had been packing his bass guitar when Taeil approach him. The bassist threw a glance at Taeil. It’s weird seeing the red-headed out of their campus. He remembered meeting Taeil, who by chance happened to be in the same orientation group as he did. The math major male looked nothing like how Taeyong had first saw Taeil but then again, he should have never judged a book by its cover. In all honesty, if Taeyong had not been attracted to Jaehyun (which he clearly still denies), he might as well be attracted to Taeil. The Taeil standing before him is someone who had piercings that he never sees the other male wearing when they’re on campus but when they’re performing, it’s like a whole new Taeil.

“Nothing really. Today was just a good gig day.” Taeyong shrugged.

“You always say that but today is your best gig day.” the red-headed frontman nudged Taeyong’s shoulder. “You can’t lie to your best friend like that. Something is up.”

“Since when are we best friend?” Taeyong gave Taeil the playful stink eye. He also tries not to fluster thinking about Jaehyun’s lips – or Jaehyun, in general.

“Since you called me the hot nerd. Anyways, it’s not about me. It’s about you. Spill the tea.” Taeil smacked Taeyong’s back playfully. 

Taeyong hissed. Taeil sure hits hard. 

“It’s really nothing.” the bassist of the group shrugged.

“Are you sure? I’m your best friend. I can keep a secret.” Taeil leaned close, making it seem like it’s their little secret.

“Really. It’s nothing.” 

The group’s frontman gave Taeyong a stink eye, even more when the former gets called by Hansol who needed help with something. “I’ll get back to you soon–”

“Go, go.” Taeyong chuckled and shooed the older male away and continues to pack his stuffs.

  
  


  


**iii.**

In all honestly, Taeyong has no idea how he and Jaehyun ended up in the same room. He had gone out to have a drink Taeil after the other male had taught him Calculus so he wouldn’t fail the upcoming test that is around the corner. Taeyong didn’t want to go home yet so he had decided to call Jaehyun since the male’s house was nearby but the call was so sudden and it was late at night and Taeyong didn’t think Jaehyun would even let his drunk ass in. He needs to stop drinking when it’s not doing him good.

“You reek of alcohol.” Jaehyun says yet remained unbothered as he gently pushed Taeyong to his bed and flopped himself on the other male for a while before rolling over to the free space next to the male.

Taeyong laughs, almost giddily and drunk. “Yeah.”

“Mhmm.” Jaehyun hummed softly then yawns, sleepiness already evading him once again.

“I’m sorry.” Taeyong apologized. 

“What for?” the younger male mumbled with his eyes closed already.

“For crashing over.” the white-haired male simply replied, still feeling awake and slightly sober because his heart was racing from how intimately close he and Jaehyun are. The butterflies in his stomach are quick to form tornadoes at this point instead of a storm and Taeyong felt like puking. Much like before, he blamed it on the alcohol he had downed earlier. Drinking with Taeil was a bad idea because unlike Taeyong, the red-headed male can hold his alcohol well.

“Mhmm, it’s okay, really.” Jaehyun mumbled softly, turning over to his side to look at Taeyong and inches close, pulling the cover over them. “ _Sleep_. 

“Mhmm.” the bassist hummed softly, noting how close they are as the other male inevitably falls asleep.

Taeyong observed Jaehyun as the latter falls asleep. It would seem creepy, if he was Jaehyun, to have another person look at you while you sleep, but Taeyong can’t seem to look away, as if he was cursed to only look at Jaehyun despite how intoxicated he was from his drinking session earlier. The bassist takes in every facial detail of the sleeping male. He starts by looking at the bigger picture of Jaehyun’s features. Undeniably, the other male is handsome, almost unrealistic and sculpted by God’s own hand, if possible. He then takes in how peaceful Jaehyun looked and slowly, his eyes trailed to the long pretty lashes of Jaehyun’s, the perfect arch of Jaehyun’s bridge and nose and the soft luscious lips of the sleeping male before him. And without Taeyong even knowing, he had inched closer and if he wasn’t careful enough, he might have even kissed Jaehyun, which was something he didn’t want doing, not without the other male’s consent, at least, or not with the male asleep. Instead, because of how flustered he had become and how intimately close he was with the other male, it had caused him to blink in reaction; eyelashes meeting the soft skin of the sleeping male’s cheeks.

Taeyong backed himself away from Jaehyun. Without saying anything and with his mind going haywire in how he had almost kissed Jung Jaehyun, he turned himself over, not wanting to face Jaehyun any longer and started counting sheep instead of thinking about the almost accidental kiss and how he could feel himself getting warm over it and for the fact that his heart is racing impossibly fast.

  


  


  


**iv.**

“I’m never drinking with you ever again.” Taeyong tells Taeil as the bassist puts his bass guitar strap over him, getting himself ready after his usual warm ups and while Taeil does his usual vocal warm up runs.

Taeil shoot him a confused look, pausing on his 5th note runs and stared at Taeyong, demanding to know why through his expression. Taeyong stared back.

“Why?” Taeil finally asked, picking his water bottle to quench his thirst and to soothe his throat after the warm ups he had.

Taeyong looked around. Jaehyun was setting up the keyboard on stage and likewise, Hansol was doing the same but only with the drum set. The bassist then leaned in when the coast is clear to whisper to Taeil. “I almost kissed Jaehyun and I can't stop talking about him– No, before you say anything, you need to hear me out, I keep thinking about him a lot like the little things he does and I can’t get the image of his lips out of my head??? And I’m just really tired of having this stupid crush on him.”

Taeil puts his bottle down and clears his throat. “Crush? Taeyong, you like Jaehyun.”

Suddenly, it felt like Taeyong had been hit by a strong wave. It all make sense now. Taeyong likes Jung Jaehyun. That explains the whole how he writes song about Jaehyun, about how he feels himself getting choked up whenever Jaehyun is near him or when the other male smiles at him and how he couldn’t stop thinking about Jung Jaehyun in general and how he had wanted to kiss the other male so badly. Because he had liked Jung Jaehyun. He sighed in relief. Perhaps, he had been denying his ‘stupid’ little crush all these while and with Taeil pointing his liking toward the group’s keyboardist, Taeyong was glad that he didn’t have to openly admit his liking towards the dimple-smiling male.

“Well I’m glad you got that sorted out but we have to get on stage soon.” Taeil lightly gives Taeyong a pat in the back before he steps on stage to join Hansol and Jaehyun.

Taeyong follows from behind, being greeted by Jaehyun’s warm smile directed towards him. The butterflies in Taeyong’s stomach would surely not give the poor bassist a rest throughout the gig.

The gig went surprisingly well. And Taeyong managed to not puke on stage despite not drinking beer this time, already learning his lessons from before and already having enough intoxication in his body. There were storms in his stomach but he tried distracting himself in the music. Thankfully, Taeil had seemed to be in the better mood to hype the crowd up, therefore earning a better drive to perform better than usual. Once the performance was over, The And City members were all packing and Hansol along with Taeil had chosen to go away first, leaving both Taeyong and Jaehyun on their own in their waiting room with the two of them still packing up. 

“I’ll go get us a drink and you can continue to pack up, mkay?” Jaehyun casually says, going out from the room. 

Taeyong watched as Jaehyun’s back disappear through the windows of the door before he sighed in relief. Being in the same room with Jaehyun has never been much of a problem until the night he had almost kissed Jaehyun and ever since Taeil had pointed out his liking. He can’t help but feel extra nervous around the male now ever since earlier.

It didn’t take long for Taeyong to finish packing but Jaehyun wasn’t back yet. The bassist then opted to play with his phone for a moment until when he looks up and sees Jaehyun making silly faces from the other side of the door through the window, causing him to laugh at how silly the other male was being. Unconsciously, Taeyong walked over to the other side of the door where Jaehyun was still making silly faces but this time jutting his lips out in an almost pouty manner and lips sticking to the window. He didn’t know what had urged him but Taeyong daringly places his lips against the window as well, kissing Jaehyun with only the piece of glass between them.

The action took Jaehyun by surprised but he had only stared at Taeyong, feeling flustered over the action. Taeyong, on the other hand, then snapped from his action and realized what he had done. He fakes a cough before going back to where he kept his case and picked up, gesturing Jaehyun that they should leave.

The walk back home was awkward, to say but halfway through their journey, Jaehyun had reached out to hold Taeyong’s hand with the excuse of how his contact had fell out and he couldn’t see the road at night.

  


  


  


**iv.**

Their next gig went by smoothly again though Taeyong couldn’t keep his eyes off Jaehyun. And at some point, he swore he and Jaehyun made some eye contact. Hansol later remarked about the sexual tension between the two backstage when they’re done with their gig for the day. 

“Does your finger hurts?” Jaehyun asked out of the blue when he approached the bassist, shoulder bumping to shoulder when Jaehyun had settled himself next to the male while the white-haired male had been inspecting his fingers and peeling the skin that had been bothering him during when he had held the bass strings during the gig earlier.

“My fingers?” Taeyong looked at Jaehyun. His callouses were unsurprisingly brittle. “Well, it used to hurt a lot when I started playing the bass. Sometimes they do but not as much as before. They’ve harden overtime but the skin still peels sometimes.” Taeyong frowns in dismay. It didn’t help that the little skin that peels off from playing the bass too much would bother him. And his neurotic bad habits wouldn’t let him live either.

“Can I touch your fingers?” Jaehyun asked innocently with a laugh. 

“Uh… sure, I supposed.” Taeyong hold his hand out, palm facing Jaehyun.

The group’s keyboardist took Taeyong’s hand, fingers pressings against the bassist’s very own. Jaehyun runs his thumb against Taeyong’s callouses before pressing them to find out if they’re hard and rough as Taeyong says. He supposed bassist and guitarist alike have fingers like these but despite how rough Taeyong’s fingertips were, Jaehyun had still liked them. Jaehyun then presses chaste pecks to each of Taeyong’s finger unknowingly.

Taeyong stares at Jaehyun whom continues to leave pecks.

“Jae.” Taeyong calls out, moving his hand to caress Jaehyun’s cheeks. The action took Jaehyun by surprised though no words were uttered from either of the male. They stared at each other for a good minute before Taeyong leaned in to kiss the other male out of impulse.

It took a while for Jaehyun to register what was happening and even more when he was taken aback and flustered by Taeyong’s action. But before Jaehyun could put a reaction to the kiss, Taeil came in.

“Hey guys, I’m about to buy us some be- Oh. Don’t mind me–” Taeil blinked once before exiting the room, leaving both the male in a state of shock.

Both faked a cough. Taeyong rubbed his nape in embarrassment while Jaehyun looked away, completely still taken aback.

“I think I like you– no, I have this stupid crush on you ever since and I like you a whole lot.” Taeyong mumbled his lame excuse of a confession, his ears turning warmer and redder than ever.

Jaehyun flustered but reciprocate the feelings. 

_I like you too._

_  
_

_  
_

_  
_

**BONUS**

“Okay but I can’t believe you never knew I like you?” Jaehyun has his fingers laced with Taeyong, head resting against his boyfriend’s shoulder.

They’re outside after a gig at night. It was all dark, saved with the light from streetlamps near them. Taeyong doesn’t drink much anymore, or smoke. Because apparently, Jaehyun is new obsession and addiction and the only ever reason Taeyong has always been nervous before a gig was because Jaehyun was there and he didn’t want to look like a fool to his crush back then.

“I didn’t know I like you until Taeil pointed it, to be fair. I suck at reading feelings.” Taeyong defended himself.

“Touché.” Jaehyun chuckles softly before sighing as he leaned in to Taeyong’s body warmth. “No, but really? I even let you in when you were drunk and you called me while I was asleep. If you weren’t someone I had liked for the longest time, I wouldn’t even open the door for my best friend.”

“I’m just a little clueless and dumb!” Taeyong pursed his lips in defeat.

Jaehyun leaned in and presses a peck over Taeyong’s pouty lips. “Fair enough. You’re my clueless dummy.”

“Oh god, get a room, you lovesick fools.” Hansol groaned when the drummer of the group came out to the alley Taeyong and Jaehyun is in, followed by Taeil who had remained immune to the pair’s sickening honeymoon ‘phase’. 

**Author's Note:**

> not the best fic comeback. anyways, this was really changing for me to write both being the reason for i) fluff and ii) jaeyong. also, this was for nctfiesta fic fest thing.


End file.
